Big World Small Boat

Private Diary of A Priest. OK, so we're not all angels...Everyone needs a place to get things off their chest! And yes, I do talk to God about it all! Even He has a sense of humour! Want proof? Well, he made me, didn't He? Oh, one last thought-If you don't like what I've written, please keep in mind - it's MY diary. Go write your own!

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Location: England, United Kingdom

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Redefining Poor Taste

Permit me to share a brief thought which I believe holds some historical certainty. Whilst there's so little that is known about him, most of the legends about St. George, the patron saint of England, are apocryphal and indeed incredible. However, I’m willing to lay wager that St. George, or anyone in the Roman army for that matter, ever ate at a Little Chef restaurant!

So I’m certain there have been a few raised eyebrows when Little Chef began distributing the flag of St. George emblazoned with Little Chef’s logo. My son and I were surprised to have received one this week, due to the fact we had each consumed a Coke, along with our grease soddened meal.

For those of you on the ‘other’ side of several ponds, the Banner of St. George is the red cross of a martyr on a white background. It was adopted for the uniform of English soldiers during the reign of King Richard I. It later became the white ensign of our Royal Navy and the flag of England. And as with any country, we’re extremely proud of our flag. But not with a commercial logo emblazoned upon it.

Our country is awash with national pride, with virtually everyone flying the flag in support of England’s team playing in the World Cup. But I’m not so certain there are many people who would look favourably upon a small, insignificant, and highly mediocre restaurant chain choosing to deface our flag in such a manner.

For the benefit of those who are not familiar with Little Chef’s, I would love to try to describe one. However, I simply lack the vocabulary to do so. In the states, one might toss up (no pun intended), the name ‘Waffle House,’ but that would be a denigrating, maligning, and inappropriate comparison. I love Waffle Houses – their food and their staff. But size wise, it’s comparable. Take away the creatively cooked breakfasts, fresh salads, plus the inimitable colloquial and friendly style of its staff and you ‘might’ have a Little Chef.

For those of you ‘down under,’ I recall hearing an affectation once used to describe such a restaurant as the local ‘choke and spew.’ And with second grade salad bits from a pre-mix bag, fried eggs that are literally brown and dried on the bottom, and underpaid staff who have lost any motivation, whatsoever, to serve, you get a good impression of the ‘new’ Little Chef.

I realise the Little Chef restaurant chain has recently been purchased. But I should hope that the new owners would have consulted a public relations team before deciding to desecrate our country’s flag. Perhaps I shouldn’t pick on Little Chef too much; there are other companies who are equally culpable. (O2, are you listening?). And whilst I'm on this rant; Madison Avenue please take heed: simply because there's a bit of white on something doesn't mean it's an enticement to put a logo on it!

It’s a pity our country doesn’t have a national chain of roadside restaurants that provide friendly service, good food, and reasonable prices. It could well do with one.

But for now, since Little Chef have deemed it socially acceptable to redesign our country’s flag, perhaps they’ll forgive my small peccadillo by slightly revising one of the greatest poems in the English language:

But on his breast a bloody Cross he bore
The dear remembrance of his dying Lord
For whose sweet sake that glorious badge we wore
And now we vow
To eat at Little Chef

I just wonder what Diocletian would have done?

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